before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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