There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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