I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Rumble strips road head = magical
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
