He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
