Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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