OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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