i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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