Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
