Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
