my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize