i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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