my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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