He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize