shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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