pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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