Buhtt sex?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
