It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He keeps bees of course he's weird
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
