Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
false alarm. still invincible.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
