You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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