i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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