kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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