Do you still have your period?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
