Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
