Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(765): View more from Indiana

You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged

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(910): View more from North Carolina

He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.

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(773): View more from Illinois

I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best

(1-773): View more from Illinois

that's your solution for everything

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(845): View more from New York

her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.

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(317): View more from Indiana

She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean

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(906): View more from Michigan

scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage

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(740): View more from Ohio

The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0

(1-740): View more from Ohio

If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it

(740): View more from Ohio

Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

She started crying because the Rugrats grew up

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