How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
