time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
