I love black thongs
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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