So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
What drink are we having for lunch?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
