god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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