I am in a vortex of obligation.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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