I'm drive I can fine osifer
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
