he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize