Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
