The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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