she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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