I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize