And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
