I want to walk on stilts...naked
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
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