I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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