Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
