I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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