My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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