he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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