i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
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