D3 body, D1 cock
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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