did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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