Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
