Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
