I think i peed on brittanys purse
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Let's get the cat blown out
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
