I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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