Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
